I have a friend, a tedious friend, who loves to use his vocabulary to try to impress people. I know, people like these are bores and most people will go out of their way to avoid them, but to me they are fun to mess with.  Anywho, I ran into him while I was waitin’ for my Jeep to be inspected.  

“Ahhh!  Rayburn Mitchum (my real name); my amicable bonhomous compadre!  Greetings and salutations!”

“Hey Chucky,” I replied and smiled.  He got a pained look on his face.

“Well,” he said, “as I informed you, at our previous rendezvous, I now go by Charles.”

“Ahhh, well, you’ll always be Chucky to me,” I said and smiled.  

He sighed, faked a smile, raised his eyebrows, and said,” Still the rapscallion, I see.”

I narrowed my eyes.  “You callin’ me a lizard?”

“What?  No!”

“You sure?”

“Emphatically!”

“You callin’ me fat?”  

“No!  Of course not......... Hold it.”  Then he smiled.  “You are making sport of me, no?” 

I smiled.  “Why Chucky?  Whatever do you mean?”

“Ha,” he chuckled and shook his head.  “Vicissitudes of life are lost on you, my friend.  However, I find that somewhat refreshing.”

“Vicissitudes of life?”

“Changes in life, per se.”

“Per se?”

“Come on.  You know what per se means, right?”

“Sure I do,” I said.  “That where my wife puts her mo-néy.”

He gave me a confused look, then pursed his lips and smiled.  I smiled back at him.  He shook his head.  “My car’s ready.” he said.  “Gotta go,” “See you later, Rusty.”

“Take ‘er easy, Charles.”

To be fair, I’m pretty sure he finds me tedious, too.